Support

Last night Bonnie talked to me about her concerns about my carrying a gun and having the permit. She wanted to know why I did it.  Was I afraid of something?  She was concerned that I carried in the house when she wasn’t home, which I don’t really do now; it was more when we first moved into the house and usually only when there seems to be a lot of ruckuses outside.  She asked if we should sell the house and move to another neighborhood if I’m that afraid of living there.

It was an adjustment when I first moved in there because all the places I lived, minus my mom’s house had always been on the top floor; for two reasons one I don’t want noise above me and two I feel safer when someone can’t just walk up to my window.  I eventually got used to living on ground level with only an occasional concern, usually when I am alone and I start getting into my head too much.

She also mentioned how she feels I’m pretty obsessed about guns and shooting, which is something my ex mentioned as well.  She said that she recently found out that her friend Doug had a gun and in twenty years she never knew. She was implying that he never talks about it.  My only rebuttal to that was to ask her how long he had been shooting and her response was that he’s been doing since he was young.  I explained to her that I’m pretty new to it, I’m learning a lot of things, which causes me to talk about it a lot, it’s a new and exciting thing for me so I think a lot about it.

My only response to the question of carrying was because I can, it’s not that I’m afraid of anything, it’s just I chose to do so.  I also said, because she is aware of all the past experiences that I had and how lucky I am that nothing bad really happened in any of them and I am too and it was a question I pondered considerably while waiting to get my permit.  She understands why our chiropractor carries because she’s leaving the office late by herself and may even be carrying money but for me to carry, she doesn’t understand.  I why I carry even if I tell her sometimes I go out during the day and get home later at night and I know she has to understand that because it was her discussing her fears of coming home late at night that got her to agree to learning about gun safety and handling and to go shooting.

Over all, last night I felt pretty deflated about the whole thing, it made me realize I need to step back about talking about guns with her so she doesn’t judge and condemn me as obsessive.  It left me feeling as if I just don’t fit anywhere in this world and I feel as if I have no support in regards to my hobby/interest, other than this bog of course.  My family, other than my dad, who is supportive and encouraging, doesn’t agree or support me in any regards.  My mom and sister talk behind my back about it and that disturbs me too, I know that my mom is condemning and judging me over this and that bothers me.  All in all, I’m not going to stop shooting, learning as much as I can and I’m not going to stop carrying either.  If they want to hate me for it, that’s their problem, I’ve lacked support from my family for most of my life so not having it now shouldn’t matter but it does leave me feeling very alone. (10.1)

Up in Arms

It's been awhile since I read something that just got me to no end that I had to post about it.

Ms. Blog Magazine




So if she's with this Brady Campaign aren't they supposed to be promoting gun safety but here she is out there purposefully being ignorant and carrying a gun to prove a point, that doesn't sound too much like promoting safety to me, granted she believes her end result is to prove stronger laws to make things safer but yet she has to be unsafe (in extremely dangerous ways) to prove this point?

I love most of all what the blog "Of Arms and Law" said:

"Another way to think about what Heidi did is this: She blindfolded herself and walked out in the middle of onrushing traffic to prove that motor vehicles are dangerous."


And that is the equivalent of Heidi carrying a gun.

Children & Guns

After today, I can't possibly imagine what parents who own guns must go through.  I mean I'm sure it's a lot different when it's your own children and you can parent and school them about guns the way you choose but when it comes to just a random neighbor child or even a friend's kid(s) it's a big difference.

I spent most the day with the neighbor kid and her cousin, they are seven.  They kept wanting to go into the house and I kept trying to get them to not go into the house under the excuse that I didn't want them to let my cats out, which is a concern but my bigger concern is that my house isn't child proof and my guns aren't secure from the prying curiosity of children.  I know I'll probably get quite a lashing about that but my friends don't have children, I don't have children, I don't have children in my family and I don't ever baby sit and there is just usually no chance of kids being in my house so I don't take that usual concern.

I also got to thinking this morning when my sister and I were hanging out in the kitchen, I'm cooking and she's just hanging out, my back was to the door and all I heard was a loud gasp from my sister because the kitchen door suddenly opened and within seconds the neighbor kid pops in through the door.  I wasn't carrying at the time and even if I were, I doubt I would have drawn my gun; the target would have been identified long before I could even draw.

This got me to thinking on two levels, one, boy I would be screwed if that was a stranger breaking into my house, no way would I have been prepared even if I had been carrying my gun.  It brought home just how quickly something could happen and how little time I would have to react.  Definitely practice is in order.

The other point being and my sister and I discussed this afterwards that we need to be even more careful that all doors are always locked, not just for the random criminal chance but because the neighbor girl could just pop in at any second.  Wonder if we were in the basement and she just starts going through our house, etc. just too many variables of very bad things could happen.

I do plan to maybe talk to her mother about how I don't mind her coming over and hanging out in the yard when I'm out doing stuff but I would feel a lot better if she didn't come into the house.  I don't and won't go into the specifics as to why I don't want her to come into the house because I don't feel I need to notify my neighbors that I have guns in my house.  I feel I just need to say that I worry about her getting into things that she shouldn't and sometimes we can't always watch her, granted the times she has been in the house I have always hovered over her like a hawk to make sure that she's not into anything that she's not supposed to be in but I would just feel a lot more comfortable her not being in my house.  Today with it being two kids, it's hard enough to just watch one but to have to watch two, I'm sure those of you out there that have kids know just how hairy that can be or maybe it's not like that when you have kids, I don't have kids so I have no clue if you just watch them constantly or not. (13.4)

S & W .50

This is a clip of me shooting a S & W .50.  Keep in mind this is one of the biggest handguns you can buy and I'm only 5'5 and 105 pounds so my handling is a little sloppy and in no way reflects my handling of other calibers.  The rounds are 300 grain.  Ok, now the disclaimer is out you can view my embarrassment.  Lol

https://www.dropbox.com/s/po3tlzpy9hxo3gn/2013-06-04%2010.55.26.mp4

By the way, I hate this gun but I can't pass up an opportunity to shoot something I haven't   

The Belly Band

As I stated in a previous post I was very dubious of the belly band for a carry option, thanks to GunDiva I had the opportunity to try one out.  Like her, it is a bit too big for my gun so there would have to be alterations made but I do believe that my sewing machine will handle it, I'll have to get some really sturdy thread.  I haven't carried with it yet but I tried it on and was really impressed with the comfort, the fact that I can put it into really comfortable positions and it hides the print of the gun. When I bend over the most that it looks like is maybe a back brace but in no way could I tell that there was a gun there.  I also liked that I don't have to try to cram all this stuff into the waist of my pants which is a bit uncomfortable and causes a lot of pressure on my back, the belly band doesn't at all.

Thank you so much GunDiva for sending that to me, it was wonderful to be able to try something out, especially since I was pretty uncertain about it.

I'll post more once I go out into the world with the belly band. Tonight's event I'm wearing a dress so I'll be carrying with the thigh holster tonight.  Today was also the first day I carried to work, I did have to leave my gun in the car though because we are not allowed to bring guns to work, there was a memo several years ago about that, only at my company would there be such a thing. We are all such gun lovers here; I love that about this company.

The Gun Loving Community - Just some random thoughts.

As I sat in the airport Sunday night awaiting my departure time to Albuquerque, NM.  I watched people walk on by, noticed a mother and her daughter (the daughter looked to be in her early 50’s) sitting there, the daughter leaning on the mother.  It was cute to see that they had what looked like a close relationship.  What disturbed me a little and got me on my thoughts about the people I have met through shooting and my love of guns, either in person or via blogs was that the way the mother and daughter looked suspiciously at everyone, including me and how a lot of people seemed do that.  Some of the people walking about I could tell they were at least into hunting or guns in some form; they didn’t seem to be suspicious or scared about other people. 

I’ve noticed it seems through the gun loving community that the people seem to be the nicest people and maybe it’s because they don’t have to worry about weird people because they know they can protect themselves if need be.  Who knows about the true mentality that goes on, this is only my own speculations and theories.  I know for myself I don’t feel the need to be scared or leery of people, especially when I’m carrying.  Granted I know there are some nuts who have gone on shooting rampages but I didn’t know those people, maybe they weren’t the type that respected guns the way the people I know personally do, I don’t really consider the mass shooters as a part of the gun community but that’s my opinion so because of this opinion I see that most the people in the gun community are just good natured people with good hearts.

Since starting this blog, it has introduced me to some really wonderful supportive people, they have encouraged me, offered advice, support and suggestions on this path of mine and I so greatly appreciate every single person who has taken the time to comment on my posts.  (13.1)

Holster/Carry Issue

I had a IWB holster that a friend gave me but I didn't like how the retention strap didn't cover where I wanted it to so I bought one that was specifically for my gun, granted it was made for having the laser but the maker said it would still be snug even if I don't have the laser on it.  Well, the holster passes all the tests; holds snuggly, I can turn it over and shake it (no the gun isn't loaded) and it doesn't come out, it even sits nice and snuggly on my belt and pants.  Sounds great right?  

Tonight I realize that I will never be able to carry IWB unless I buy super baggy pants and even then I probably won't be able to.  I really don't have a lot of carry options other than when I wear dresses.  I can't do the bra holsters because I lack the real estate to properly hide it.  I'm dubious of the bellybands so I don't want to spend out that kind of money and unless they make an ankle holster that is sized for a child, that one is out too.  I will not ever purse carry, unless of course I can make my own purse that is to my style and liking, I have yet to see a carry purse that was even remotely attractive and not mention, I'm not a fan of off body carry.

I feel a tad disappointed, not giving up though, I'll just continue to wear dresses to carry until I can determine something that does work, even if I have to take leather classes and design my own.  I would possibly consider a shoulder holster but I still think I'm just too thin to really hide; I would definitely need a vertical draw one.

On another note, I think going to the range at least once a month is healthy.  I had my annual exam and the results was everything is perfect and in the words of my doctor, "Your cholesterol levels are brag-able."

I haven't had much to post about lately.  Kathy Jackson is coming to Colorado again for a two day pistol class and also a gun retention class.  Sadly, I won't be able to do it this time either, if only I was independently wealthy, didn't need a new driveway, A/C and a back fence.  Maybe next time....